Sunday, September 21, 2008

A stiff stiffy

Obscene title, I know, but how could our entire class discussion not bring up the issue of necrophilia in a more extensive manner?! Sure, great, everyone loves a hot gossip, we know that, BUT SHE SLEPT WITH A DEAD GUY. What does she do with him? Why is she attracted to a dead man? Was it because her father prohibited her from social dating? Having been deprived of a man's love all her life by her controlling and aristocratic father, was she just yearning to be with a man, dead or alive, for the rest of her years? Why kill him, then? (This is the part when all feminists holler 'The only good man is a dead man!' and carry on burning their bras.) I guess he doesn't complain, he doesn't argue with her, he doesn't bug her all night for sex, he can't go out and hang with "the boys", he can be just the man she wants that her papa didn't want her to be with.

See what I just did there? I gossiped.

I guess we all just love to gossip, especially when it's about someone of a higher social standing. The tabloids went nuts when Britney Spears went nuts, and we lapped it all up. Bill Clinton's sex scandal was hot news too. We're jealous, we want to see the rich and famous crash and burn. It gives us mere mortals a thrill, because maybe we actually wish we were rich and famous and embroiled in our own scandals.

I don't know, I just don't think they gossip about us. Emily certainly didn't give off that vibe. Was she gossiping with her man-servant about the townies? I doubt so, they aren't nearly as interesting and entertaining as she is.

Gossip is in the realm of peasants like us. Necrophilia, however, is not. We should be gossiping more about corpse-shagging, rather than gossiping about gossip.

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